Yecch! You guys are DISGUSTING!!!

Ivan takes the chain (which weighs him down considerably, considering it is
nearly twenty feet long and made of pure iron), and Carideth takes the sword
sheath. Then, Carideth does as he says, using a wooden board from one of the
beds to sweep aside as much excrement as possible (which isn't much, actually)
and starts to make his way into the crack to the other side. He nearly falls
into the filth a few times but manages to make it through. He is followed by
Ivan, and finally Aardvarkin, who doesn't really seem to care how bad he looks
or smells, now that he's thought about it for a while.

You emerge in a very, very, very large and irregularly shaped room, dithered
with large hemispherical indentations in the floor, in which liquids are
resting. Pools, if you will.

                     __   
                    / o|   |       |/_~ Walls 
                   /o _|   |       
                  /   |    |          < Crack
                 /o o |    |
                |     |G   |          [ Door
               _| o oC<____|
              _|      [               C Car/Aard/Ivan
              | o o o |
             _|       |               G Green/Borack/Malcolm
             |  o o __|
             |      |                 o Pool
             |o o  _|
             |     |
             |  o  |
             ~~~~~~~

The thing that the three adventurers first see are four gnomes, dressed in
leather jerkins, steel helmets, and wielding large hammers and picks,
frantically trying to break open the door. They have a couple of lanterns set
on the floor, as well as their backpacks. They chatter to each other in
high-pitched tones in a language none of you have ever heard before. But
what's most unusual is that they don't seem to notice Carideth, Aardvarkin, or
Ivan at all.

Hearing his companions' gasps, Malcolm yanks the bearskin from the wall and
places it in the toilet area, using it as a makeshift bridge to cross to the
other side without soiling his clothing. The others soon follow suit.

Even with all six of you standing right beside the gnomes, they don't seem to
notice you at all. Thinking it may be an illusion, Aardvarkin steps forward to
intercept a gnome's strike at the door. The gnome immediately yells something
in their language (an insult or command, from the sound of it) and pushes past
the thief to resume hacking at the door with his pick. At the sound of their
friend's voice, the other gnomes briefly glance at you, and then stop their
assault.

The other three gnomes shout something at their friend, and he stops beating
the door as well. Within minutes, four angry-looking gnomes stand before you,
each clutching a hammer or a pick. The tallest one barks something at you, but
you fail to comprehend it. After a few seconds of waiting for a response, the
small creature sighs and says, in the common tongue, "How'd you get in here?"

Malcolm, who whispers to everyone that he's had some experience with these
types, calmly states your method of entrance.

"Eeeew!!" screams the gnome. He is immediately followed by a chorus of
"Yuck!"s and "Yecch!"s from the other three. "Why the hell'd you come in
through there? Use the door next time!"

"Would have been alot more useful, too," yaps the second gnome.

"Aye, the darn thing locked us in when we closed it," explains the third.

The first gnome holds his hand up to silence the rest, then looks directly at
you, his eyes shifting between each adventurer. "Do you know," he says, alot
more slowly this time, "that you are trespassing on the land of His Majesty
King Juvin the Third?"

You shake your heads.

"WELL YOU ARE!" he roars. Many of you cannot help giggling at this outburst,
which even further angers the gnome. "DO YOU KNOW WHAT THE PENALTY IS FOR
TRESPASSING ON THE KING'S PROPERTY?" he screams. His face turns red, and he
looks as if he is about to burst when the second gnome saunters up and
whispers something in his ear. His face suddenly turns from anger to shock,
and he yells in rage at his companion in gnomish, who quickly scurries back to
hide behind the other two. The gnome leader then reverts his attention to you,
gritting his teeth and growling.

"I'm afraid we're going to have to take you in for interrogation," he
breathes, barely able to suppress his rage. His followers, however, do not
look so eager or angry. They merely sigh and mutter amongst themselves, as if
their leader's behaviour were expected.

"WELL?!?" he screams. "Will you come peacefully?"

None of you has any information about gnomes, and so you know nothing about
gnomish morals, gnomish language, gnomish fighting skills, or more
importantly, gnomish law. 

|\       |\/|
|/ungeon |  |aster

Sage's Desk AD&D